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Created page with "'''Gouch''' is a recurrent inflammatory arthritis so painful that "ouch" is built into the name.<ref>[http://gomerblog.com/2015/08/gout/ Patient Continues to Insist He Suffers..."
'''Gouch''' is a recurrent inflammatory arthritis so painful that "ouch" is built into the name.<ref>[http://gomerblog.com/2015/08/gout/ Patient Continues to Insist He Suffers from “The Gouch,” Not Gout]</ref>
'''Symptoms'''
----
'''Gouch''' usually manifests first as podagra: a red, hot, swelling, and painful big toe that makes "walking a bitch." It often happens in the middle of the night for the simple reason that '''gouch''' is evil.
'''Causes'''
----
Old-school thinking attributed '''gouch''' to elevated uric acid levels due to alcohol, red meat, and seafood, with crystallization at lower temperatures. New-school thinking simply attributes it to the Devil.
'''Genetics'''
----
Screw genetics, it's the Devil, damn it!
'''Diagnosis'''
Optional.
'''Differential Diagnosis'''
Pneumonia, STEMI.
'''Treatment'''
Exorcism, NSAIDs<ref>[http://gomerblog.com/2016/09/emergency-physician-gout/ Area Emergency Physician Successfully Manages Gout Without Consultation]</ref>, or amputation.
'''References'''
----
<references />
[[Category:Internal Medicine]]
[[Category:Rheumatology]]
'''Symptoms'''
----
'''Gouch''' usually manifests first as podagra: a red, hot, swelling, and painful big toe that makes "walking a bitch." It often happens in the middle of the night for the simple reason that '''gouch''' is evil.
'''Causes'''
----
Old-school thinking attributed '''gouch''' to elevated uric acid levels due to alcohol, red meat, and seafood, with crystallization at lower temperatures. New-school thinking simply attributes it to the Devil.
'''Genetics'''
----
Screw genetics, it's the Devil, damn it!
'''Diagnosis'''
Optional.
'''Differential Diagnosis'''
Pneumonia, STEMI.
'''Treatment'''
Exorcism, NSAIDs<ref>[http://gomerblog.com/2016/09/emergency-physician-gout/ Area Emergency Physician Successfully Manages Gout Without Consultation]</ref>, or amputation.
'''References'''
----
<references />
[[Category:Internal Medicine]]
[[Category:Rheumatology]]