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COVID-19

543 bytes added, 09:03, 24 March 2020
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'''Symptoms'''
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Symptoms can range from no to yes. The most common include fever, nonproductive [[Cough|cough]], [[Dyspnea|shortness of breath]], loss of smell, loss of taste, myalgias, and anorexia. Less common symptoms include sore throat, rectal prolapse, and urethral discharge. In very rare instances, it can present as a scrotal abscess. The majority of cases are mild, with exception of the deadly ones. Spring weather makes differentiating between allergy symptoms and '''COVID-19''' symptoms very challenging.<ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/tips-is-it-allergies-or-covid-19/ Tips: Is It Allergies or COVID-19? (Gomerblog)]</ref> The first confirmed U.S. case was a 35-year-old male with minimal medical problems who ended up being hospitalized for 11 days. F**K.
'''Special Considerations'''
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* ''Supply of N95 respirators & surgical masks'' - Supplies have been dwindling worldwide. U.S. Surgeon General Jerome Adams tweeted "STOP BUYING MASKS!" to Americans, though this had little impact on the American supply chain. Adams ultimately was caught hoarding masks, but their reintroduction into the health care system only bought another week of time.<ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/surgeon-general-jerome-adams-caught-hoarding-n95-masks/ COVID-19: U.S. Surgeon General Caught Hoarding All of Nation’s Masks (Gomerblog)]</ref> Decreased availability of N95 respirators has forced health care professionals to use lower quality N94, N93, N92, N91, N90, N89, N88, N87, N86, N85, N84, N83, N82, N81, N80, N79, N78, N77, N76, N75, N74, N73, N72, N71, N70, N69, N68, N67, N66, N65, N64, N63, N62, N61, N60, N59, N58, N57, N56, N55, N54, N53, N52, N51, N50, N49, N48, N47, N46, N45, N44, N43, N42, N41, N40, N39, N38, N37, N36, N35, N34, N33, N32, N31, N30, N29, N28, N27, N26, N25, N24, N23, N22, N21, N20, N19, N18, N17, N16, N15, N14, N13, N12, N11, N10, N9, N8, N7, N6, N5, N4, N3, N2, and N1 masks, and even these are running low. The supply of surgical masks has also been depleted even though '''COVID-19''' hasn't peaked. The [[Centers for Disease Control and Prevention]] has suggested the use of homemade PPE such as bandanas and scarves as a last resort. Gomerblog has suggested other creative items should the supply of bandanas and scarves become depleted. Some of these include: sweaty sports cup, jock strap, pantyhose, turtleneck (pulled upwards), winter cap (pulled downwards), Saran Wrap, large condom, tampons (placed in nostrils), ski or SCUBA masks, snorkels, and horse feed bags.<ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/covid-19-tips-facemasks/ COVID-19 Tips: What to Do When No Facemasks Are Available (Gomerblog)]</ref>. Despite what would appear to be a dire situations, Americas nurses remain upbeat as they can't think if anything else better to do after a 12-hour shift than to make their own personal protective equipment.<ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/nurses-excited-to-make-their-own-ppe/ Nurses Excited to Make Their Own PPE (Gomerblog)]</ref>
* ''Supply of health care professionals'' - Contact tracing of the first U.S. cases of '''COVID-19''' led to the 2-week self-quarantine of anywhere from 40 to 200 health care workers. In the event of a patient surge, such quarantine protocols would eventually deplete the work force. Subspecialists are the most sensible back-ups given their prior training in medicine or surgery. OB/GYNs have already volunteered their services on the front line, but radiologists are already being drafted, putting them in the unique position of performing their own [[Clinical Correlation|clinical correlations]].<ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/radiologist-drafted-into-direct-patient-care-forced-to-perform-own-clinical-correlation/ Radiologist Drafted Into Direct Patient Care, Forced to Perform Own Clinical Correlation (Gomerblog)]</ref> Orthopedic surgeons are relearning ICU things.<ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/orthopaedic-surgeons-attempting-to-re-learn-icu-things-🤦%E2%80%8D♂%EF%B8%8F/ Orthopaedic Surgeons Attempting to “Re-learn” ICU Things (Gomerblog)]</ref> In the extreme scenario shortages still persist, first-year medical students, undergraduate students contemplating a career in health care, and toddlers with Fisher-Price [[Stethoscope|stethoscopes]] will serve as backup.
* ''Supply of ventilators'' - It is very possible that the American trajectory of '''COVID-19''' will mimic Northern Italy, leading to a shortage of ventilators. To bridge the gap, the American Medical Student Association will provide medical students to bag those patients until ventilators become available.<ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/covid-19-vent-shortage-med-students-bag/ COVID-19 Solution: In Event of Vent Shortage, Med Students Will Bag Indefinitely (Gomerblog)]</ref>
* ''COVID-19's effect on global markets'' - '''COVID-19''' has arrested economic activity, causing markets to crash worldwide. The United States has been trying to combat recession through multiple routes. The Federal Reserve Bank of New York has slashed interest rates to near zero and plans to buy back $500 billion in Treasury and security-backed bonds. It is also considering pushing 1 amp of bicarb. Congress has rapidly approved stimulus packages aimed at providing Americans with more toilet paper and [[Xanax (Alprazolam)|Xanax (alprazolam)]].<ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/covid-19-house-relief-package-toilet-paper/ COVID-19: House Relief Package to Provide Billions & Billions of Dollars of Toilet Paper (Gomerblog)]</ref><ref>[https://gomerblog.com/2020/03/covid-19-congress-to-send-1000-pills-of-xanax-to-every-american/ COVID-19: Congress to Send 1,000 Pills of Xanax to Every American (Gomerblog)]</ref> It speaks volumes that all of the blame thus far has been directed at '''COVID-19''', not [[Blame Anesthesia Algorithm|Anesthesia]], suggesting that the apocalypse has in fact arrived.

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