A stick of butter should never be peeled like a banana and eaten like a snack.
Awkward Encounter Between Patient and Provider
PROVIDER (after walking into room): Hi, Mrs... Ummm, whatcha doin'?
PATIENT (removing stick of butter from purse, peeling back the foil, and eating in monstrous bites): I'm hungry, so I thought that I'd have a snack.
PROVIDER (disgusted, almost nauseous): Do you snack like that often?
PATIENT: I sure do!
PROVIDER: So I see you've come in with congestive heart failure.
PATIENT: It always flares up! Do you know why?