Difference between revisions of "Parents"
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Revision as of 05:39, 27 June 2017
Parents are those people brave enough to have a child. Parents are a subset of family and, generally, are awesome people, especially when it comes to medical care and vaccinations.[1] In these instances, parents, for lack of a better term, sorta suck.[2] At any given opportunity, clinics run by parents should be closed[3], parents who might be anxious or troublesome should be given Ativan (Lorazepam)[4], and parents who name children based on backwards nouns should be given a hefty eye roll.[5] For these reasons and also to preserve the sanity of new parents, Congress enacted 80-hour week restrictions for new moms and dads.[6]
Related Reading
- Family
References
- ↑ Adorable Unvaccinated Pertussis-Infected Baby Sues Her Parents (Gomerblog)
- ↑ Breaking News: Injuries Soar as Parents Push Tiny Toddlers Through Black Friday Crowds (Gomerblog)
- ↑ Finally A Clinic Run by “Parents Who’ve Done Their Research” Opens (Gomerblog)
- ↑ Hospital Approves Giving Parents Medication Before Children’s Surgery (Gomerblog)
- ↑ Breaking News: Nurse’s Eyes Get Stuck After Aggressive Eye Roll (Gomerblog)
- ↑ U.S. Government Adopts 80 Hour Per Week Restrictions for New Parents (Gomerblog)
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