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Patient Satisfaction Survey

6 bytes added, 03:44, 14 September 2016
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# On October 22, 2014, the Centers for Disease Control discovered that patient Charles Hankford acquired the Ebola virus through a '''patient satisfaction survey'''. As a result, the use of '''patient satisfaction surveys''' was suspended in favor of incinerating them.<ref>[http://gomerblog.com/2014/10/cdc-ebola-2/ CDC Confirms Ebola Transmitted Via Patient Satisfaction Surveys]</ref>
# On January 28, 2015, staff from three departments - Emergency, Surgery, and Internal Medicine - were [[Number Needed to Chastise(NNC)|chastised]] since their '''patient satisfaction surveys''' weren't up to par with the Labor & Delivery floor, where patients were full of joy welcome their first adorable child into the world.<ref>[http://gomerblog.com/2015/01/patient-satisfaction-scores/ Hospital Administrators Chastise Emergency, Surgical & Medical Staff for Patient Satisfaction Scores Lagging Behind L&D]</ref> Staff tried to convince hospital administrators that comparing to life-altering traumatic injury with a newborn baby wasn't fair, but the arguments fell on deaf [[Anatomy of the Ear|ears]].
# On January 30, 2015, children were devastated when [[Doc McStuffins|Doc McStuffins]] was not renewed for a new season after her '''patient satisfaction surveys''' lacked to show any "excellent" ratings. The empty slot was filled by Adam McBriefcase, the animated hospital administrator who fired her.<ref>[http://gomerblog.com/2015/01/doc-mcstuffins/ Doc McStuffins Forced to Resign Due to Dismal Patient Satisfaction Scores]</ref>
# On March 21, 2015, 23,000 hospitalized patients were polled to determine what factors are associated with a high Press Ganey score. The results are show in Figure 7.

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