Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving is an annual holiday in the United States typically held on the fourth Thursday in November, and it is marked by the presence of turkey and the absence of medical providers who are stuck working in the hospital.[1] An exception to this rule are (1) students, who are specifically sent home in order to diagnose family members; and (2) hospital administrators, who deserve a break from all that administrating.[2][3] The holiday celebrates when the Pilgrims came to North America in 1621 and were scheduled for overnight call, thus completely missing dinner with the Native Americans. The spirit of Thanksgiving is quickly forgotten the next day when everyone tries to kill one another on Black Friday.[4] A similar holiday is held on the second Monday of October in Canada.
Carving the Turkey
In the event a surgeon is able to attend Thanksgiving, he or she should never be allowed to carve the turkey; it always ends up butchered with everyone questioning the surgeon's career choice.[5]
The Dangers of Gravy
On November 22, 2016, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention issued a blood-gravy content chart, not dissimilar to existing blood-alcohol content charts, warning Americans this holiday to not get behind the wheel after generous consumption of gravy.[6]
Fun Fact
The ubiquitous turkey sandwich found in hospitals are an homage to the first Thanksgiving call in order to remember those medical providers past and present who have missed a holiday meal.
References
- ↑ Hospital Workers Can’t Think of Any Other Place They’d Rather Be on Thanksgiving Day
- ↑ Medical and Nursing Students Return Home This Thanksgiving Ready to Diagnose Their Families
- ↑ Bold Hospital Planning on Operating Over Thanksgiving Weekend Without Hospital Administrators
- ↑ ACEP Renames Black Friday “Black & Blue Friday
- ↑ Surgeon Struggles to Carve Turkey at Thanksgiving
- ↑ CDC Issues Blood Gravy Content Chart for Thanksgiving
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Fun Stuff
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