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Earth is the third planet from the sun and the only planet in our solar system to have evidence of intelligent life as well as orthopods. It is approximately 4.5 billion years old and despite that had remained Full Code and even the Fullest Code Possible all these years.[1] That is until the United States pulled out of the Paris Accord, after which Earth immediately asked Palliative Care to consult and be made DNR.[2] To add salt to the wound, President Donald Trump called Earth a loser.[3] Earth orbits once around the sun every 365 days. It is very easy to lose sight of this fact when one is in residency, where time is often said to stand still.

From space, Earth is combination of green, blue, and white, which scientists attribute to Pseudomonas infection, cyanosis, and cataracts respectively. Earth is also referred to as the Pale Blue Dot, a sign that it is anemic and probably in need of blood transfusion sometime in the near future.

Related Reading


  1. Earth Day News: After 4.5 Billion Years, Earth Remains Full Code (Gomerblog)
  2. With Plug Pulled on Paris Accord, Planet Earth Eligible for Hospice (Gomerblog)
  3. Calling Earth a “Loser,” Trump Vows to Make Better Deal with New Planet (The Borowitz Report)

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