Call Light

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Figure 38: The evil device close-up

The call light is the invention of Johnathon Knochasilver and, as a result, he has been destined to the Ninth Ring of Hell. The call light was unfortunately designed to be pressed no fewer than 40 times per hour so that patients can inform the nurse that they're both in 20 out of 10 pain and hungry.[1] That being said, Andrew Whitestack became a household name when his story of pressing a call light 46 times in one hour undoubtedly saved his life.[2]

The annoyance of call lights was recognized during National Nurses Week in 2015 when call lights were disabled with the use of bedside scissors.[3] Nurse satisfaction surveys noted positive scores as a result. The same thing happened on July 4, 2016 when call lights were specially outfitted to replace their obnoxious sounds with America's most patriotic sounds.[4]


In late February 2017, Gomerblog published what are regarded as the most up-to-date guidelines on how to use call lights. The guidelines can be accessed here: Tips for Patients: How to Use a Call Light.


On March 22, 2017, the American Nurses Association approved a new generation of call lights with lockout intervals.[5] Utilizing technology that had only been reserved to patient-controlled analgesia, the new patient-controlled call lights should address the well-documented call light fatigue contributing to nursing burnout. For more information, see Patient-Controlled Call Light.

Related Topics


  1. Inventor of Call Light Enjoying the 9th Ring of Hell (Gomerblog)
  2. Amazing Survival Story: Patient Lives by Pressing Call Light 46 Times in a One Hour Span (Gomerblog)
  3. Charting Suspended, Call Lights Disabled, Bathroom Breaks Okayed for National Nurses Week (Gomerblog)
  4. Patriotic Call Lights, Pagers to Play National Anthem (Gomerblog)
  5. Approves Call Lights with Lockout Intervals (Gomerblog)

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